Sex, Lies and...

Pairing: Jim Ellison/Blair Sandburg
Category: Cliche, First Time, Humor
Rating: NC17
Summary: Pretending that you have what you want most of all. Easy? Hardly.
Notes: Written for the 'Getting A Sense of Clichés' challenge on the ts_ficathons community. Combination of cliché (Undercover Lovers) and a specific sense (hearing).
It's a cliché, I figured it couldn't hurt to just let go and write whatever came to mind. This, however, means that it's time to suspend your disbelief and THEN read the story LOL.
Thanks to Nicci for cheering on and to Brynn and Etakyma for some insightful beta sessions -- couldn't do it without you girls.
Word count: 4,723

"But Simon..." Jim was aware his voice had a certain touch of whininess to it. With this case, he was ready to get down on his knees and beg if that would help.

"No 'buts', Ellison," Simon grumbled. He was sitting behind his desk, looking more than a little tired. "I've got the damned Mayor breathing down my neck about this -- We have to solve it as fast as possible."

"Preferably yesterday," Blair muttered low enough that only Jim caught it.

"Sir..." Jim tried again. "The plan wasn't all that good to begin with and now that Connor's down with the flu..." Jim wondered if he sounded as hopeful as he felt. He did not want to do this.

"Look Jim, you said your father called you about this problem, asking for help. Now it's an actual case and we have to make whatever we have work. "

"Just because my old man is afraid of what these blackmailers will pull up on him eventually, doesn't mean I want to stick my neck out," Jim muttered darkly.

"Does it matter who's getting blackmailed?" Blair asked in his most reasonable voice. The one Jim hated almost as much as his 'give-it-up-Jim-you'll-be-doing-things-my-way-anyway' voice. Those voices he hated the most because they always meant Jim ended up in trouble. "I mean, it's wrong, even if it's the type of people you'd rather not socialize with."

Jim had to silently agree with him. Not that he'd admit it openly. "The idea was that I should go under cover with someone who knows about my senses, to avoid anyone asking unnecessary questions. And let's face it, Connor is the only woman who does."

Simon bit into his cigar, shooting Jim a sour look. "You could always take Blair," he suggested, half in jest. At least Jim hoped it was in jest.

Jim's eyebrows flew upwards. "Sir, I know you want to give them something to actually target me for, but..."


The sound stopped Jim dead in his tracks. Okay, that was the one thing Blair could say that would strike the fear in Jim's heart.

"Think about it, Jim," Blair said, pursing his lips, looking every bit as edible as always. For a moment he didn't even fight the image in his mind of his partner, lounging on Jim's bed, dressed in jeans, unzipped and flaps drawn back to..., Jim shook his head. This was not the time, nor the place for his overactive imagination. "If there are no repercussions afterwards for you, what would the problem be?"

"Look, Jim..." Simon put on his most friendly voice. Jim figured now as a good time to get really worried. "We both know putting you and Connor together probably isn't enough to catch their attention anyway, unless we go into some strange background story... on the other hand, if someone recognizes you as William Ellison's son, and you're shacked up with a guy..."

"My father's gonna have a cow," Jim snorted. "Even for this, he'd never agree to be in on something that might damage his reputation."

"You'd be the one with the guy, theoretically it'd be your rep on the line," Simon argued.

"You don't know my father, Simon..."

There was a light cough from Blair. "You know, Jim. You father did say he'd do anything if we could stop whomever is behind the blackmailing."

"I very much doubt he had in mind a scenario this...," Jim searched for the right words. "This insane."

"Aw, Jim," Blair cajoled. "I'm your usual partner -- your guide. Who'd be better to do this?"

"A woman!"

"I'd hate to break it to ya, big guy, but you with a woman isn't exactly blackmail material," Blair said dryly.

Jim sighed and leaned forward, resting his forehead against the dark wood of Simon's desk. He wondered for a moment if perhaps he could get out of it all if he simply banged his head against the hard surface hard enough to do damage. Then again, he knew when he was defeated, and his boss teaming up with his partner was a force even he couldn't fight.

Feeling Blair patting him on the shoulder, warmth seeping through Jim's thin shirt, he sighed in defeat.

"I'll get in touch with your father, Jim, but I'm sure he'll agree to this being a viable plan."

"Thank you, Simon," Jim said acidly. Damn, but this would prove to be a bad case. How the hell could he get through a case where he had to pose with Blair as his boy-toy? It was just a tad bit too close to his own fantasies.

Talk about cruel and unusual punishment.

"I don't like this," Jim grumbled. He really didn't and he'd keep telling anyone, whether they were interested or not.

"I know," Blair sighed as he put his suitcase next to Jim's by the door. "But it's the best plan, even your father agreed to it."

Jim snorted. Sure, his dad had agreed, but not without several questions to reassure himself that his eldest son and said son's roomie weren't actually a couple. "He uses that place for recreation as well, Chief. It's just a matter of time before they dig something up on him anyway."

Blair shot him a wide grin. "The beauty of self-preservation."

"Obviously not something we have," Jim said wryly as he checked the last couple of things before they left. Nothing in the fridge that would be able to walk on its own when they got back. He'd hated it even before his senses had kicked in, and now? Yuck. He could actually hear the mould grow when he'd found something they'd forgotten about in the fridge.


"What don't we have?" Blair turned and shot him a questioning look.

Jim checked the windows. For the third time. "Sense of self-preservation."

Blair's snort made him smile.

"So... what do we do when we get there? And do we have any idea of how long we'll be staying at the resort?" Blair asked as he tied his hair back, getting ready to leave. "I mean, I know it's get-away for rich people who like discretion..."

"We make sure to reveal that the trip's paid by William Ellison, that I'm his son," Jim sighed. He'd like to know how Simon had talked his dad into that. "And I have no idea for how long Simon expects us to keep going. Probably until we get some kind of evidence."

"I was thinking more along the lines of filling out time, acting around each other?"

Jim stopped in the middle of the living room, staring at Blair. "We... I don't know, relax, have a good time..."

"Touch," Blair said, pursing his lips, looking like he was searching for the right words.

"Huh?" was all Jim could think of saying. Touch?

"You gotta be ready to touch me in public, Jim. We need to give them something to use against us."

"I touch you plenty in public..." Jim trailed off. Okay... that hadn't come out quite right.

"Eh... right," Blair said, clearing his throat. "What do we have to worry about? Bugs? Cameras?"

Jim was glad to turn his wandering imagination back to their case. "It's been mostly audio, with copies sent to the victims. A few of them have received photos as well."

"So we make sure to make a lot of noise in bed..." Blair's grin turned downright boyish. "That's gonna be so much fun... even jumping in bed..."

Jim stared at him. Was the kid nuts?

"Come on, Jim." Blair shook his head at him. "We can't convince them that we're having an elicit affair, without having hot monkey sex, can we?"

Jim sighed internally. An unknown number of nights in hell. Maybe he should ask Blair to actually have sex. It'd be easier to handle than listening to Blair making sex noises. Unless of course if he dialed his hearing down...

"Coming, Jim?" Blair asked, smile perfectly innocent as he looked over his shoulder at Jim, his features seemingly sharper than normally because the hair was drawn back, taking the softness of Blair's face down a notch or two. Still, it forced Jim to take a deep, cleansing breath.

Jim groaned and managed to not stare at his partner's ass. 'Not yet,' he thought to himself with an internal sigh, wondering if he'd survive this case.

"Oh man, this is heaven," Blair exclaimed as he fell back, bouncing up and down, for all in the world looking like a small kid playing on his parents' bed.

The room was... well, it was better than Jim had expected. He'd feared some kind of opulently furnished room. It was obviously expensive, but the style wasn't as 'loud' as he'd expected. The room was large, light and airy, the windows big enough to let in a lot of daylight. The walls were a very light cream and in the middle of the room was the bed that Blair was so impressed with. An old-fashioned four poster bed. The sheets that Blair was currently creasing were the same light cream as the walls.

Jim squashed the urge to join Blair on the bed and crease the sheets even more. Instead he focused his hearing. Nothing, at least not close. No local whirr of electronic noise that would give away the presence of any listening devices. Though...

"Well?" Blair finally asked, sitting on the edge of the bed, his face once more showing a modicum of seriousness.

"Nothing in here, but three rooms down there's something fishy. Probably a listening device." Jim cocked his head to the side and listened intensely, anchoring himself to Blair with vision and smell to keep from zoning."

Blair nodded. "Makes sense that they don't install it in every room. That they'll wait until they have reason to believe they can get something good."

Jim agreed. "Yeah, but we shouldn't mention anything case-related from now on. Who knows if anyone's listening."

"You're a sentinel, man. You should know, but yeah, I agree. So, shush, only 'R&R' talk from now on. Let's unpack and go for a walk, attract a little attention."

Jim rolled his eyes. Attract attention. Sure, somehow he doubted this upscale resort was used to gay couples, then again, who knew with rich people? If they could pay their way out of facing the consequences of their actions, they would.

"I think I could get used to being your sex-toy," Blair grinned as they strolled through the park of the resort.

Jim reached out and tugged at a stray curl.

"Ow! What was that for?"

"To keep you in line. We forgot to bring your leash." He couldn't help but smile at Blair, who was looking like an advertisement for R & R. Loose char-coal cotton pants and a matching shirt with some weird embroidered lines on the sleeves. Probably something he'd picked up during his travels, sure didn't look like something you could buy from an ordinary American outlet.

"Aw, man. I didn't know you were that kinky," Blair said as he slid back into place next to Jim. Jim hesitated, then put an arm over Blair's shoulders. Hey, as long as they had to do this, he might as well enjoy it.

It seemed to have been the right call, as Blair shifted a moment later and plastered himself to Jim's side. Intoxicating. The smell of Blair's shampoo, his skin, soap, sweat... And the sounds. The softness of his voice, and the strange, but familiar sound of the now loose-hanging shoulder long hair brushing back and forth, moving. Jim had gotten so used to his partner wearing his hair tied in the back that he hadn't realized how much he'd missed it free flowing. It was like little whispers, enticing promises. 'Jim, my friend,' he thought to himself. 'You're getting positively mushy.' But oh, how he wanted to turn his head just enough to bury his face in Blair's hair, nose his way down to Blair's neck, lick, taste...

The next noise to draw him out was the rumble from his partner's stomach. Jim laughed, covering up his little 'zone'. "I take that's a question about dinner?"

"Wow, a newfound 6th sense, Jim?" Blair said teasingly, not making any moves to let go of Jim, for which Jim was pathetically happy.

"Nah, I figured even the restaurant staff heard that rumble."

Blair sniggered. "So, we eating in the suite or at the restaurant?" he asked.

"I say we flaunt it," Jim said. Jeez, he was a glutton for punishment.

"All expenses paid," Blair laughed with a wicked glint to his eyes.

Jim hid his own smile. "I can't believe my old man would pay for this," he admitted. Just in case anyone was listening. Of course the bill would go to the city in the end. Seeing this was a CPD case. Still, they wanted anyone who might be listening to think that William Ellison would be a good choice of victim, thanks to his son's 'seedy' lifestyle. And Jim had to admit he was enjoying it, having an excuse for touching Blair, for creating a little fantasy world where he had a real life with Blair.

Dinner was... interesting. Jim ate a steak that was probably perfect, but he wasn't really tasting the food. No, he was far too wound up in their flirting. Sure their conversations often held a tone of it, but now?

Everything was a fucking double entendre.

Blair wasn't exactly making it easier, but he was definitely working well within his role as Jim's 'toy'. Flirty smiles, twinkling eyes, licking his lips suggestively. The way his body was reacting to his partner's show, there was a damned good risk of Jim not making it up from his chair before his slacks would be ruined.

"Jim?" The questioning tone was mixed with some very dark huskiness that completely bypassed Jim's brain and headed south. "Are we ordering dessert or will that have to wait until we're back in our suite?"

Yeah, innocent question, huh? Right. Not. Well, two could play that game, and if Jim was going to be embarrassed, he might as well take his partner down with him.

"I vote for ordering room service, ice cream, and perhaps cherries." Jim pursed his lips and partly succeeded in rerouting his arousal, focusing on his own voice attaining a timbre that he hoped was sexy.

He wasn't sure if it worked, but Blair's expression shifted slightly, eyes widening. Well, either he was making an ass of himself or it was working. It hit Jim just how divided he was by this case. On the one hand, he wanted this to go on forever; on the other he couldn't wait to get back to normal. Or, what passed for normal at 852 Prospect, anyway.

Jim plastered on a fairly sincere grin as he stood. Dinner was going on the tab, they could leave now. It would most definitely make it look as if Jim couldn't wait to get his plaything back to their room.

Which was true, because Jim was planning on making Sandburg pay, one way or another, for the torturous dinner. Even if Blair hadn't meant anything with his words, Jim felt an odd spark inside him that wanted to throw Blair down on that huge bed in their suite, tickle him, get him to laugh until it hurt. Until the familiar face would be sweaty, flushed and Blair so relaxed that Jim could fool himself for a few moments, that he could tell himself that Blair's debauched looks came not from fighting off Jim's fingers, but far more because they were what they were posing to be.

Fuck, he was one sick puppy... make that one very aroused sick puppy, too.

Blair licked his lips then smiled. "I like a man with a plan."

Christ, Jim wanted to tell the guy to stop right now. Unfortunately anything like that might scare the perps away.

Damn, life as James Joseph Ellison sure as hell wasn't easy.

'What the hell am I doing?'

The thought hit Jim had as they made their way down the hallway, toward their suite. The soft, thick carpet made people's footsteps sound like whispers. No one seemed to pay them much attention. Save the occasional disapproving look, most were discrete. People with money, often old money, and bad habits... oh joy. Just the kind of people that Jim liked.

Next to him, easily keeping his pace, Blair seemed to be going from relaxed to slightly nervous. The covert looks he was sending Jim had the older man wondering. And it made Jim nervous as well. Their cover was supposed to be just that; a cover... right?

'Right, tone it down, Ellison. Of course you're making the kid nervous.'

The walk to their suite felt at least twice the distance. And the moment he unlocked the door, his hearing zeroed in on the sound, intercepting the noises of electronic equipment.


Looked like they'd hit pay dirt earlier than any of them had expected. Yeah, one listening device in the lamp, probably another on the phone, a light humming sound from the bathroom.

Blair arched an eyebrow, question quite clear. Jim nodded, then frowned. Somewhere behind him... Jim stepped closer to Blair, their bodies nearly touching. It couldn't be a camera he was hearing, could it?

Blair's frown mirrored his own. Still, he couldn't quite explain...

"Jim..." the voice was low and hit Jim just right. A warm hand descended on his arm and Jim closed his eyes, letting his hearing take over. Somewhere under the familiar grounding sounds from his partner and the bugs there was something more...

No... wasn't a camera. He was fairly sure it was just another bug.

Jim's focus returned to Blair's face and as Blair touched his earlobe Jim nodded. Yeah, they were bugged alright.

Something flashed in Blair's eyes, then the most wicked grin Jim had ever seen curved onto Blair's lips. Jim had a mere moment before Blair spread his arms wide and let himself fall back on the bed, a mirror of his actions earlier. Only this time he pushed himself back on the bed, eyes sliding closed.

"Mmmm, Jim."

Jim blinked and stared down at his crazy roomie.

"Oh yeah, right there..."

Jim's eyes widened. What the hell...? He watched as Blair dug his fingers into the bedspread, arching his back.

Had he given his own secret away? Because right now either Blair was teasing him or so completely clueless that it hurt.

Jim wasn't sure which was worse.

Hmmm, either way, he still had to get back at Blair for earlier and he knew his partner well enough to figure out the perfect punishment. Jim pushed his arousal down and knelt on the bed next to Blair.

Blair turned his head and watched Jim with a grin and a wink. His smile faltered as Jim's widened and a moment later, Blair shook his head slowly, as Jim lifted a hand, aiming for Blair's belly.


"Come on, Blair-baby, you know you want to..."

"Jim, I swear if you so much as..." Blair pulled in his stomach, futilely as Jim grinned. Fingers connected with Blair's shirt, and Jim was surprised at the body heat from underneath the garment. Mmmm, nice, warm, alive.

Jim gave Blair his most innocent smile. Always make sure your enemy doesn't know what you're up to. Then he struck, fingers dancing over Blair's chest, sides and belly, too fast for the younger man to intercept him.


Ah, revenge sure was sweet, Jim thought to himself as he brought up his other hand and tried to get to the writhing body. Maybe he was getting too caught up in it, because Jim didn't think twice about straddling Blair's lap to keep him in place.

The rustle of bedding, Blair's whines and pants, it all added up to the loveliest symphony to Jim. Added to the sight of Blair's red face, the sweat on his upper lip... the wild hair...

Jim stopped, oddly enough feeling as much out of breath as Blair looked to be. The scent of sweat, herbal shampoo and arousal hit him. For a dizzying moment Jim thought it was his own interest he could smell, then it hit him. Yeah, he could smell his own arousal, but the pheromones dancing around him were from the man under him.

Oh. Would that be evidence enough?

Blair shifted under him, closing his eyes. Ah, okay, coupled with the feel of something hard and heated pressing up against his ass, through two layers of pants would seem to be further evidence.

If he stopped now... he might blow their cover. If he didn't... he might blow a friendship to hell. If he didn't stop... he might get more than friendship.

Blair's eyes flickered open and Jim lost whatever doubt he had that Blair's reaction wasn't for him alone. He wasn't sure he'd ever seen eyes like that, and for a moment Jim feared he'd be zoning on them. And he'd never heard quite such noises that Blair was making under his breath.

Okay, he most definitely wasn't the only one feeling the need right now.

"Jim..." Blair's voice was low, lower than it normally was when he was guiding Jim. Husky, warm, thick... And if Jim had been close to zoning on the look in Blair's eyes, it was nothing compared to that voice.

Jim's fingers went from torture to caress in a heartbeat. Sliding his hands down, he worked his fingers under the hem of Blair's shirt, feeling the rise and fall of the belly, felt the warm skin, the hair...

Jim let out a sound that startled himself as well as Blair.

"Jim... quit the growling or I won't last another second," Blair warned, eyes wide, mouth open.

Letting out a moan, Jim pulled his hands back, leaned forward and put them on either side of Blair's head. Taking a deep breath he stopped a mere inch from Blair's lips.

Blair still wasn't touching him, fingers still clenched in the bedding, though no longer because Jim was tickling him. Now it seemed to be the only thing anchoring Blair. Damn, he had to work hard if he was going to get Blair to lose it as much as he was.

Jim let out another throaty rumble, eyes zeroing in on the light sheen of sweat on Blair's upper lip. Without giving it a second thought, Jim's tongue flickered out to lick it. Salty, a little sweet as well. The feel of Blair's breath against his face, the scent... Jim let out a small moan before he repeated the lick, this time following the slightly curved upper lip down to the corner of that wicked mouth.

Fingers suddenly dug into Jim's hips, Blair's body moving as much as possible underneath him. Jim shifted and buried his fingers in Blair's hair, holding his head in place as he licked at the wet lips.

Blair's breathing came in short, harsh pants and a distinctive mewl was all it took for Jim to dive in, sealing their mouths together.

He'd been wondering for a while, what it would be like to kiss Blair. But even as good as Jim's imagination was, he'd never thought it could be this good. All his senses seemed to converge, everything widening. Somewhere on the edge of his awareness Jim realized there was something hinky about the sound from one of the bugs, but as Blair's fingers slid up under his shirt, Jim promptly forgot.

No match. Blair's clothes were no match for a determined, horny as hell sentinel.

"Jim... Jim, oh fuck," Blair gasped as Jim's mouth closed on his bared throat. It took a moment for Jim to realize that Blair was pushing at his shoulders. "Off, Jim."

Jim tried to get his brain to work. Off? Jim was confused, Blair had seemed to be enjoying it. Maybe he wasn't ready for this? Maybe Jim had read him wrong? Then it filtered through as Blair tugged at his shirt, and Jim let out a sigh of relief and did as Blair wanted. Never say anything bad about military efficiency. It took Jim no time to strip off his own clothes, dump them on the floor and cover Blair's warm body with his own.

Oh, bliss...

"Jim..." Blair's voice was barely audible.

Silencing him with a rough kiss, Jim closed his eyes. He had to make this good. What if it was the only time it would happen?

Blair broke their kiss, panting for breath. A hand cupped Jim's face and Blair grinned up at him.

"About fucking time, you idiot," he whispered only loud enough for Jim to hear. "I thought I had to give you a lap dance to get you to see things my way."

Jim gaped at him. "You little shit," he said, feeling his own lips stretching into a wide grin. Shifting his hips, Jim sighed deeply. Oh yeah. He wasn't about to try anything fancy in the middle of a case, so all he did was wrap himself around Blair, pressing, moving, pre-ejaculate and sweat easing the glide of their cocks against each other.

Blair pulled Jim's face close again, initiating a slower kiss, allowing their tongues to twist and dance against one another. As Blair's hands slid down Jim's back to dig into his ass, Jim thought he might blow it right there and then. He didn't, at least not for a few more thrusts.

Damn, he'd have to last longer the next time. Then again, he didn't feel terribly bad about it, because the way Blair's body was shaking under him, he wasn't the only one who had trouble lasting for more than a few minutes.

The air was thick with the scent of sex and Jim buried his face against Blair's neck, smiling as he licked the sweaty skin.

Now, to end this case as quickly as possible, because Jim had a few things he needed to pick up, supplies, actually. And then all he had to do was get his partner home and into bed. The upstairs one.

In the end, the case was solved far faster than Jim could have imagined. Christ, those guys would have to have been lucky not to have been caught earlier. All Blair and he had to do was wait.

Two men, both working as cleaners, had found a way to make some quick cash. One of the guys actually had the nerve to try to use the gathered material to force them to let him go.

"It was an act, man," Blair told him with a laugh, "you've got nothing on us."

"Didn't look like nothing," came the surly answer.

"We're that good," Jim drawled before he read them their rights and called Simon. To think such a couple of idiots hadn't had the brains to stop while they were ahead. Greedy bastards. And all they'd have on him and Blair would be audio only. Thank God.

Simon just told them to write up a report that would state nothing but the necessary facts, then they could have the rest of the day and the next off. "I'll take care of the evidence they've gathered myself," he told Jim. "Whatever audio they've got on the two of you, there's no need for anyone else to think it's real."

Jim coughed.

"We all know it isn't," Simon grinned, "but someone might get the wrong idea."

Jim gave him a sloppy salute and grinned at his partner. "You don't have to tell me that twice, Simon," he said as he snagged Blair's sleeve and they walked away from what had been a memorable stay in a luxurious suite, their suitcases in hands.

"Good thing it's only audio," Blair said in a low voice, grinning.

Jim frowned. There was still something bugging him... Bugging... bug... Jim stopped dead.

"Eh... Chief?"

"Yeah?" Blair stopped and turned, watching him with a raised eyebrow.

"There was something hinky about the noise from one of the bugs..." Jim began. "I, eh..."

"What are you saying?" Blair asked, looking even more puzzled.

"I get the feeling we might not want Simon to handle all the evidence."

"Oh shit," Blair breathed, eyes wide.

Oh shit indeed.

The End